Sage Thiru-valluvar
"The Bard of Universal Man"
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Chapter - 19 : Not Backbiting
 

Translation(s)

Though a man’s lips do not speak virtuous words and all his deeds are ill; if such a man does not defame his neighbor then there is good within him still.

Explanation

Couplet 150 on ‘Not Coveting Another’s Wife,’ is similar.

Translation(s)

More vile than him who scorns virtue and performs evil deeds, is he who slanders friend and then meets him with a false smile.

 

Translation(s)

It is more virtuous for a man to die rather than live and then slander an absent friend and falsely praise when near.

 

Translation(s)

In presence though unkindly words you speak, in absence do not say (such) words as their ill results exceed what you think.

Explanation

[Check translation] Prophet Muhammad (saw) advices followers to avoid negative behaviours while talking to others in following words in The Holy Quran:

"O ye who believe! Let not a folk deride a folk who may be better than they (are), not let women (deride) women who may be better than they are; neither defame one another, nor insult one another by nicknames. Bad is the name of lewdness after faith. And whoso turneth not in repentance, such are evil-doers." - Al-Hujraat 49.11, The Quran. [7]

Translation(s)

The slanderous meanness that defames an absent friend proclaims that this man (the speaker) is virtuous in words but not in heart.

Explanation

[Check translation] Prophet Muhammad (saw) also advices not to backbite in the following passage:

"O ye who believe! Shun much suspicion; for lo! some suspicion is a crime. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you love to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Ye abhor that (so abhor the other)! And keep your duty (to Allah). Lo! Allah is Relenting, Merciful. - Al-Hujraat 49.12, The Quran. [7]

Translation(s)

One who delights to dwell on his neighbor’s sins, the world will tell the story, culled out with care, of his sins.

Explanation

Thiru-valluvar’s advice for householders, most of whom lived in small village communities. He is saying, if you gossip about the faults in your neighbor’s households, they will gossip about those yours and give adequate publicity.

Translation(s)

People, who do not know the friendly art of speaking pleasant words, speak words that sever hearts and drive choice friends away.

Explanation

Dale Carnegie will surely agree.

Translation(s)

The people, whose nature bids them to proclaim the faults of closest friends, what mercy will they show to other men’s good name?

Explanation

There are people who by nature all fault finding and do not spare even closest friends. Since they find faults even in closest friends, they will do the same for everyone else also.

Translation(s)

It is ….. charity that makes the earth sustain their load who, watching neighbor’s absence, tell tales of slander to outside world.

 

Translation(s)

If each person scans his own faults as he would of neighbors, could any evil happen to living man?

Explanation

This is an ironical statement. We are unable to see ourselves and unable to instruct ourselves on virtue as objectively as we are able to see and do for our neighbors. Poet imagines that if all are able to be objective in this sense, there would be no evil in the world. Herein also lies the value of opinions and views of one’s neighbors or friends. Confucius also said the same thing:

"I have yet to meet the man who can see his own faults and censure himself." - Confucius, Analects, 5:26

Summary Note

We should not speak ill about our friends and neighbors in their absence. We should learn the friendly art of saying pleasant words. There are people who have a fault-finding nature. We should try to see our faults as clearly or objectively as we can see others. Speaking ill of friends behind their back is worse than having scorn for virtue or doing ill deeds.This chapter says that we should not lie behind a person’s back (that is we should not back-bite). One of the commandments common to Judaism, Christianity & Islam is not bear false witness against one’s neighbor. These commandments are closely related to the value / ethic described in this chapter. The commandments tell us not to lie (bear false witness) about one neighbor in a court of law – i.e. in front of the person. The same act of lying about one neighbor (behind his back) is prohibited in kural.

“Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour” – Ten Commandments, Deuteronomy 5.16, The Bible [3]

"...And if ye give your word, do justice thereunto, even though it be (against) a kinsman; and fulfil the covenant of Allah. ..." - Prophet Muhammad (saw), The Straight Path, Al-Anaam 6.152, The Quran. [7]

"(O man), follow not that whereof thou hast no knowledge. Lo! the hearing and the sight and the heart - of each of these it will be asked." Prophet Muhammad (saw), The Straight Path, Al-Isra 17.36 [7]. If we compare this commandment in Islam with the sequence in Judaism and Christianity; it becomes apparent that it is also about not bearing false testimony.

Slander: a false or malicious report: injurious defamation by words or by looks, signs or gestures (distinct from libel, English law): defamation whether spoken or written (Scots law): Calumny [11]

View from South-East,
Thiruvalluvar Memorial (133 Feet, 7000 Tonnes), Kanyakumari, India
Credit: Mahesnn_2000, Flickr

References